Friday, May 23, 2008

I got distracted with beer all month and haven't been drawing as much as I'd like. I hope to change that! from now on, when I drink, I draw.

Kevin, what I just did to your sister is known as 'cannibalism'.
I hope my brutal honesty will lead to me being known as your coolest uncle.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008


Sometimes at night...
...I sneak into the abortion clinic...
...And if I squint my eyes just right I can see the baby ghosts floating to purgatory.

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

God I have an addictive personality. Thankfully I never tried cigarettes.

Monday, April 7, 2008

"I'm just saying, for once, after a long day of performing miracles it'd be nice to come home to something cooking on the stove"
Jesus could turn water into wine, but never a ho into a housewife.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

"You're a bad son. I knew I should have fucked Wolfman instead."

Friday, March 28, 2008

Never know for his table manners, Ted utters:
I think I hit a retard with my car on my way to work. There's even a diaper stuck to my front bumper.